Are you, too, breathlessly waiting for details of new citizenship criteria determining whether you have the right stuff to be an American?

The updated moral character requirements are sadly short on specifics. It’s almost as though Department of Homeland Security chief Kirsti Noem wants character to be determined by the eye of the beholder, and who knows what Noem wants her immigration agents to behold, other than her evolving closet of military-grade accessories? Personally, I can think of 192 presidential orders, two Epstein file choices and a parade of badly knotted red ties that fail the new screen for “technically lawful” but “inconsistent with civic responsibility.”

Luckily, we professional snoops have our ways, and I scored a cheat sheet of questions from our new citizenship tes

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