If you've been following the Trump Death Watch, we have some bad news for you. The 79-year-old authoritarian, lying, gaslighting, bloviating windbag is still alive. However, what he said during his announcement on moving Space Force base from Colorado to Alabama didn't add up. For one, he shit all over Colorado for having mail-in voting, then handed the project over to Alabama, a state that consistently ranks in the bottom 10 of U.S. states on education. For another, he spoke about reports swirling over his bad health, calling them "fake news." And if you believe this hogwash, you must be a Trump supporter.

At one point, Fox News's Peter Doocy said, "How did you find out over the weekend that you were dead?" He, of course, brought up Handsome Old Joe Biden, who, as it happens, is alive a

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