Dear Lizzy,

I’m in my mid-20s and started dating a guy I met in college about five months ago. He’s great, we get along well, we have shared interests, we are both transplants from the same area in a different, new city (we moved to the new city at different times, separately), which is probably one of the reasons we feel comfortable with each other.

But, there’s a catch – I know this guy because he dated my teammate in college (I played on a sports team and this guy played the same sport). They have been broken up for years now and I am not super close with the former teammate. But some of our mutual friends think I am breaking some kind of “girl code” for dating this guy and they don’t think I should tell her.

I am not sure what to do! She definitely doesn’t know about it yet but we h

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