Cane Corsos are regal, intimidating, and built like bodyguards, but let’s be honest: if they had thumbs and a phone, they’d reveal themselves as big softies with strong opinions about snacks and personal space. Here’s what your Corso’s inbox might look like today.

1. “I saw a leaf move. Should I alert the neighborhood or just you?”

Your Corso’s watchful eyes don’t miss a thing. Whether it’s an actual intruder or a butterfly with bad timing, they’d absolutely send you a play by play text.

2. “Why is the couch off limits when it’s clearly designed to fit me?”

A dog that weighs more than most middle schoolers will never understand why you don’t want them sprawled across your furniture like royalty. They’d text this with a photo of themselves halfway on the cushions.

3. “I licked the todd

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