GAZA — Amid recent explosions of left-wing terrorism around the country, Hamas issued a rare public statement this morning to ask Democrats to please tone down the violence a little bit.

"Please, it's too much. You're all making us look bad," said Hamas spokesterrorist Muhammed Muhammed al-Muhammed. "If this keeps up, our esteemed terrorist organization will lose its reputation as the most violent and feared organization in the world."

"So please, maybe take a break for a few weeks and let us do some terrorism too, inshallah."

Sources confirmed that leftists had been on a blood-soaked murder streak for the last several years, dwarfing atrocities attributed to well-known terror groups like Hamas, Hezbollah, and The Walt Disney Company. "Democrats are quickly becoming the most feared mult

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