Sean "Diddy" Combs broke his silence in court Friday ahead of his sentencing, directly addressing the judge, his victims and his family in a tearful statement.

Judge Arun Subramanian sentenced Combs to 50 months – or just over four years – for his conviction on two counts of transportation to engage in prostitution. A jury convicted Combs of the lesser charge in July after his two-month, headline-making trial, though the 12 jurors ultimately acquitted the embattled music moguls on the top charges of racketeering and sex trafficking.

Combs, who arrived in the courtroom Oct. 3 wearing a sweater and sporting a gray beard, spoke directly to Subramanian before the judge announced his decision.

"My mother taught me better. My faith taught me better … I got lost in the journey of life. I got lost in excess. I got lost in my ego. Because of my decisions, I lost my freedom," he said. "I've totally destroyed my reputation. I've been humbled and broken down. I hate myself right now. I've been stripped down to nothing."

Of the bombshell revelations in Combs' trial, many came from his former girlfriend, singer Casandra "Cassie" Ventura Fine, who at nine months pregnant testified for a harrowing four days that Combs physically abused and controlled her and had her participate in marathon drug-fueled sexual encounters with male escorts. Those sessions, dubbed "freak offs," often involved travel across state and even international boundaries.

Combs in his allocution issued an apology to Ventura Fine and her family. He said the most difficult part of the entire trial was "not being able to express how sorry I am for my actions."

"I personally apologize to Cassie Ventura for any harm I've caused to her emotionally or physically. I don't take that lightly," Combs said. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry I brought you into my mess."

He also apologized to all victims of domestic violence for the "despicable, disgusting video" – referencing the hotel security footage from the now-shuttered InterContinental Hotel in Los Angeles where he kicked and beat Ventura Fine – and blamed himself for losing the opportunity to raise his children.

In his courtroom comments, Combs became emotional addressing his family.

He turned to his children in the courtroom gallery and said, "I'm so sorry. Y'all deserve better," before starting to cry as he looked at his mother, Janice Combs: "Mom, I failed you as a son. I'm sorry. You taught me better, you raised me better."

Combs took full accountability and responsibility for failing his community and vowed to continue changing for the better if given a chance. He said he would immediately work to help incarcerated people get on the right path if he were to be released.

"I got lost. I'm not a bad person," he said. "I know I've been changed for the better. I can't change the past, but I know I can change the future. I beg your honor for mercy."

He said prosecutors sought to make an example out of him but asked Subramanian to make him a positive "example of what a person can do if you give me another chance."

"I don't want to let God down. I don't want to let my family down. They need me. They're scared, I'm scared. I have no one to blame but myself. I know I'll never put my hands on another person again," he added. "It's not a scheme to get less time. … This story is real. This story is tragic. I don't care about the fame or money or records or performing."

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: What did Sean 'Diddy' Combs say? See mogul's tearful words before 50-month prison sentence

Reporting by Patrick Ryan, Anika Reed and Anthony Robledo, USA TODAY / USA TODAY

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