An American flag rests on a stack of chairs in a packed up classroom at a school in Washington, DC, on August 23, 2024. Allison Robbert/The Washington Post/Getty Images/File

A few years ago, when my husband was still in the army, we went to a semi-regular parent and staff meeting at our kids’ school.

It was the beginning of the school year, just after Blue Star Welcome Week , an annual event launched by the nonprofit Blue Star Families to support the families of the more than 600,000 active duty and transitioning veteran families that settle into a new community each year.

I’m on the board of Blue Star Families and I had been talking to military spouses about what makes them feel welcome in a new place and many pointed to gestures by others in the community involving their children:

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