We offer: Passionate, devoted, deeply scarred fandom with decades of unwavering, mostly unrequited, loyalty.

Background: For years, I was in a committed, long-term relationship with Baseball. She was my first love. The smell of the grass, the beauty of a pitcher’s duel, the seventh inning stretch…

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But the romance is gone. The trust has been broken. Baseball, to paraphrase the greatest baseball movie ever made , is a deceptively simple game. You catch the ball. You hit the ball. You throw the ball.

While my (now ex) team has occasionally demonstrated a passing familiarity with skills #1 and #3, they have collectively decided that skill #2 is more of an abstract concept than a practical application. They approach the batter’s box with the confidence

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