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So, you've heard all about the many jobs opening up in the Secret Service after the Trump Rally Debacle -- but do you have what it takes to be an elite guardian for the highest-ranking public servants in the nation?

We at the Babylon Bee have compiled a list of the 12 requirements that Secret Service recruiters are looking for. Do you measure up?

Ability to navigate deadly 5-degree roof pitch: Not for the faint of heart.

Can holster a gun in under sixty seconds: Bonus points if you can get it in four tries.

Able to avoid getting distracted by people screaming, "Hey, there's a guy with a gun on the roof.": Focus is key.

Be less than 5'6" tall: Must be able to easily hide behind the President.

Able to do at least two girl push-ups: Only the st

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