It’s a conversation many people find difficult and uncomfortable, so of course the recently departed Jilly Cooper had it, on steroids. In May 1999 she published a detailed plan for her own funeral , which included what she should wear (“a trouser suit, because of my legs”).

She opted for cremation over burial, and photographs of her family in her coffin, along with champagne and chocolates. She stipulated the music, the readings, and about the party afterwards, which would be full of gossip. Jilly added a few suggestions too, like, “One of the nicest funerals I went to had a lot of wolf-hounds at the party, and that was a frightfully good idea, because every time somebody got drunk, they could lean against a large dog.”

Making your specific wishes known is an excellent idea, and some

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