Key points

Money—not exposure—is what sustains a career.

Saying no creates space for the opportunities you truly want.

Not every opportunity that fits your mission deserves a yes.

You can decline requests without offending anyone.

A few weeks ago, I got a call from someone asking if I’d lead a three-hour workshop on intergenerational relationships at work.

They launched into all the details—the date, the audience, the session goals —and then came the line I was waiting for:

“We don’t have a big budget, but we can offer you $X as an honorarium.”

Translation: We want a five-course meal for the price of an appetizer.

Their proposed rate was roughly 10% of my typical speaking fee.

Here’s how I responded: “I love that your organization wants to learn more about intergenerational re

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