Dear Carolyn: I am recently divorced, with two adult sons, 19 and 23. One son is autistic and nonverbal. I have one local brother and sister. Both are single. My brother’s home is a mess, and my sister is not far behind, plus she doesn’t cook. Neither has enough seating or dishes. I now live in a small apartment, but I can make it work. Subscribe for unlimited access to The Post You can cancel anytime. Subscribe

I have always hosted holidays and special occasions. I enjoy the prep. But I get very little help. My brother sits in the recliner and reads the newspaper. My sister chats with one son and watches football. I clean up, make “to go” bags and keep an eye on the son with autism. He needs supervision. His brother will occasionally jump in and help him.

Last year, I had a knee repl

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