Dear Eric: My sister, Olivia, died unexpectedly about a year ago. I received the call. I in turn called my other brother and sister. Of my family, only Olivia and I were close. My brother bullied us mentally and physically during our childhood.

She has an adult son, who decided to let the state take care of things, as they were both transient. There was no service.

During that time, I worked through a tremendous amount of grief and sadness, as well as guilt.

Almost a year later, my brother dropped this bomb that my other sister and I could purchase an urn and that he would make arrangements for a mass and burial for Olivia. It was more of an order, than a request. The bully rose again.

I did not want to do this. I grieved my sister already and did not want to go through it again.

He

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