GARDEN CITY, KS — Brethren Plumbers, a local plumbing operation known for shoddy work, has denied unethical use of religion in their business dealings despite having a business card prominently featuring an Ichthys, also known as a "Jesus fish."

"I was drawn to them because they're Christians," said Robert Quint, a sad excuse for a man who can't even do his own plumbing. "But now I'm starting to think they're just using the fish to make themselves look really honest. It's so hard to find a plumber that won't rip you off so you see a Christian and think they must be on the level."

"Not these guys!" he continued. "They said they would fix my toilet, but instead they dug a hole in my bathroom floor and broke my water line. I had to call the atheist plumber down the street to fix it."

Breth

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