'I didn't know I wanted to live until I wrote my suicide note'

Mike McAdam had always enjoyed good mental health until, at the age of 32, a sudden and all-consuming flood of depression hit him like a tsunami.

‘I had no history of mental health struggles and to this day I still don’t know why it happened. I had everything you could have wanted; I was married, I had a really good job, I owned a house, had a dog. But I just felt heavy,’ Londoner Mike explains.

It began in January 2017 when, on what was supposed to be a life-changing three-week trip to Australia and Thailand , Mike inexplicably felt incredibly sad.

He didn’t tell his then-wife, as he himself didn’t understand what was happening. Instead, Mike brushed it off, expecting the gloom to disperse.

However, when he got back to the UK, his mental health deteriorated further.

‘I was