Dear Abby: I have been married for 38 years. We have three adult children and four grandchildren. I have always wondered whether I have stayed in the marriage out of obligation and/or because I got a young woman pregnant. I have on many occasions asked myself if I should have ended it and continued on with my life after the first child was born. I have tolerated the lifestyle I created and would like some advice from someone who has heard about a lot of circumstances.

—Unsettled in New Jersey

Dear Unsettled: A divorce at this point will disrupt the family unit you created and have nurtured all these years. Would it be worth the pain and expense involved? Once you have your “freedom,” what do you plan to do with it? Some discussions with a licensed counselor may help you gain perspective.

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