Dazzlingly awful children's Christmas plays are being rehearsed just as parents rehearse their lies about how good the play was and how good their child was in it. Teacher Jodie Johnstone said 'This year our theme is suffering. Specifically making parents aware of just how insufferable their little "angels" are.' Parent Shelley Stevenson whispered conspiratorially 'God bless Bluetooth headphones, I'll be listening to a podcast whilst they shriek "Little Donkey" in 3 or 4 different keys. I'm also

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