Key points

Statements that show empathy, attention, and respect (EAR) can calm a conflict.

Setting limits with EAR Statements can help in ongoing relationships.

Setting limits without EAR Statements can help you avoid arguments with manipulative people.

Setting limits is hard. When someone else’s behavior is impacting your life in a negative way, it can be important to set limits on them for your own protection or to create space to thrive in your own endeavors. This can happen in families, at work, in your community, online, or anywhere. However, the question arises: Should I show some empathy to the person who I am setting limits on? Or even pay extra attention to them? Or emphasize how I respect them? The answer is: It depends.

In my book with Ekaterina Ricci, SLIC Solutions for

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