CORN, OK

Pastor Mark’s new “accountability and discipleship plan” has totally backfired, after not a single parishioner replied to his email asking them to keep track of their hours of Bible reading and service.

“I’ve had to excommunicate them all,” said Pastor Mark, lead pastor and only remaining member of the Grace and Forgiveness Church. “I hate to see them go. Especially the Pletts. But they didn’t reply to my email either. Very disappointing.”

Pastor Mark will begin his journey of building up an entirely new congregation this Sunday.

“I’ll be preaching, handing out bulletins, setting up the chairs for faspa. You name it,” said Pastor Mark. “I’ll even be playing the piano. My wife Susan didn’t make the cut either and I had to let her go.”

Pastor Mark says he’s not too concerned ab

See Full Page