INTERCOURSE, PA

Young Caleb Hershberger of Intercourse was really looking forward to getting out into the wild world of the English during his this year, but so far he’s been totally disappointed.

“ ! The English are more uptight and strict than any of us back home in Intercourse,” said Hershberger, as he discarded his suspenders and hat for a mask and backpack full of hand sanitizer. “I always thought these Englishers were a wild bunch, but they seem pretty buttoned up.”

As he strolled down Fifth Avenue in Manhattan, Hershberger was shocked to see how skiddish the English were around strangers.

“Anytime I get too close, they yell or run away,” said Hershberger. “I mean, even the bishop back home lets us get within six feet of the women.”

Hershberger was also really confused by how em

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