Remember being an adolescent on the cusp of puberty and being bored, bored to tears, during weekly services at synagogue or church?

Nuthin’ else to do but flip through the holy book in the pew, and then, wow, there it was — the “Song of Songs.”

What!?!

“The curves of your thighs are like wrought rings,

the handiwork of a master.

Your navel a crescent bowl,

let mixed wine never lack!

Your belly a mound of wheat

hedged about with lilies.

Your two breasts like two fawns,

twins of a gazelle.

Your stature was like a palm tree,

and your breasts were like clusters.

I thought: I will climb the palm,

I will grasp its stalks,

and let your breasts be like grape clusters,”

Really? In the Bible? Wow!

Who knows what uplifting response young Jesse Bernstein may have had as an adolesc

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