ROYAL Parks have debunked Farage’s claim that eastern Europeans are eating swans. For the avoidance of doubt, neither are they snacking on these:

Middle class wives

The Baltic states are home to a rich variety of culinary delights, such as kugelis, cepeliani potato dumplings and beet soup. None of these recipes call for prime cuts of women in their mid-50s from the Cotswolds to be slow cooked in the oven for 13 hours. So when the Mail inevitably starts reporting this in a couple of months, ignore it.

The King

His fingers may look plump and succulent, but the King has little dietary appeal to eastern Europeans. Not only is he difficult to source, his 75-year-old flesh is likely tasteless and stringy. Plus there’s the whole chore of having to pick the edible bits of his carcass apart fro

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