HARTFORD, CT - Kids attending Fountainlife Community Church gave scathing reviews to third grade Sunday School teacher Mike Willis's flannelgraph story as the reenactment of Jesus's ministry suffered from abysmal frame rates throughout.

"What is this low-resolution, low-FPS trash?" one kid shouted as the teacher slowly moved Jesus from one side of the board to the other to talk with the Pharisees. "I've seen better textures in Minecraft for cryin' out loud." Characters in the story were moved along the felt board as the story slogged along,

In addition to the low frame rates, children claimed characters popped in out of nowhere, showing severe flaws in the technology being used to relate the story. The people in the story were also "pretty obviously just 2D sprites," rather than the high

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