TUSCON, AZ - Local man Sambo Gillschnoz slowly emerged from his home on Timrod St. yesterday afternoon to retrieve a sushi order that had been left on his porch, but only after he was absolutely sure the DoorDash driver had completely vacated the area.

Unfortunately for the hungry man, the delivery driver then decided to take a break, sitting in his car and playing Kingdom Rush on his phone for twenty minutes before finally leaving. By then, the sushi order was growing warm in the hot afternoon sun.

Neighbors claim Gillschnoz then slithered out of his home like a snake and slowly dragged the bag of food back into the shadows. When a car drove by he hissed violently and slammed his door.

"He's become a ghost ever since COVID," said next-door neighbor Margaret France. "He's a nice guy,

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