ST. LOUIS, MO — According to sources inside the Anheuser-Busch company, scientists at Bud Light have been hard at work on a time machine that would go back about six months.

No one really knows exactly why six months is the target amount of time selected, though some insiders suggest it could have something to do with a dip in sales, stock, motivation, and morale that began around that time.

"While we don't have any functioning time machine yet, we're getting much closer," said lead time machine scientist, Dr. Gary McPherson while conducting a thorough examination of a four-person hot tub extruding various wires, tubes, and what looks like a flux capacitor. "We will soon be starting trial runs using drunk monkeys in swim trunks."

Some say the company has suffered severely since creating

See Full Page