Microsoft just purchased Activision and wasted no time in unveiling a bunch of promising new upcoming titles. Here they are:

1. Minesweeper: Modern Warfare - An action-packed first-person mine defusing game. You'll even get to play multiplayer, where 13-year-old kids will insult your mother for not defusing the mines quickly enough.

2. Tony Hawk's Excel - Forget spreadsheets: it's time for SHREDsheets! Basically just Excel with Tony Hawk instead of Clippy.

3. World of Warcraft: Wrath of Clippy - This exciting expansion has Clippy take over Azeroth, but he's just a minor annoyance really. He's no Lich King.

4. Bill Gates' Divorce Simulator - Also basically just Excel.

5. Call of Duty: Forced Vaccination Squad - The next exciting COD game will have you playing as Bill Gates going

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