Dear Annie:

I love my family, but every gathering turns into a drama. My mother criticizes my sister, my sister snaps back and before long I’m stuck in the middle trying to keep the peace. I leave these visits emotionally drained and sometimes wonder why I keep showing up. I don’t want to cut ties, but I also don’t want to spend every weekend refereeing arguments that have nothing to do with me. How do I set boundaries with my family without becoming the “bad guy”?

— Tired of the Drama

Dear Tired of the Drama:

The only role you are required to play in this family production is yourself. You are not the referee, mediator or emotional punching bag. The healthiest boundary you can set is simply this: “I will not stay in the middle.”

When the arguments start, excuse yourself. Step outside

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