Hawaiʻiʻs governor would make a perfectly fine presidential candidate if we want to pretend this is still politics as usual.

On a sweltering New Orleans evening in July, the final night of the 2028 Democratic National Convention, the party chair introduces its new presidential nominee.

“With great pride, I present to you proud and patriotic Democrats our chosen nominee and the next president of the United States of America, Dr. Josh Green!”

Josh Green? Come on! How is this possible? He doesn’t even register in the polls. Get serious.

Green himself says it is “highly unlikely” that he will be president as he, in NBC’s words , “toyed rhetorically” with the possibility of leading the country. Translation: “Maybe, maybe maybe. Pretty please. But not now.”

Chortle all you want. But frank

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