Each week, exclusively for Slate Plus members , Prudie discusses a new letter with a fellow Slate colleague. Have a question for Prudie? Submit it here .

Dear Prudence,

I’m a woman with a partner of three years, “Jane.” Jane wants to have a baby and rather than using an unknown sperm donor, she has suggested that our friend “John” would be the perfect donor. I was OK with this idea until Jane told me her plan.

She said she didn’t want to use the turkey baster method because it’s unlikely to work and she found the idea of it demeaning. She said she would rather have sex with John the old-fashioned way. At times I’ve felt Jane was being flirty with John, so when I mentioned this, she accused me of making up excuses and imagining things. I put my foot down and said I wouldn’t b

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