J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings novels—and the associated “legendarium” of characters, histories, myths, maps, and constructed languages—have served as a bedrock of so-called “nerd culture” since their publication in the mid-1950s.

With its clear-cut characterizations, and (more-or-less) cleanly delineated lines between Good and Evil, Tolkien’s imagined Middle-earth—a vast and geographically variegated realm teeming with elves, dwarves, wizards, dragons, orcs, and halflings—can be fairly called archetypal. It is the sort of modern myth that can be adapted to any time, place, or scenario. Well, almost any.

Recently, the US Department of Homeland Security has taken to “Shire-posting.” That is: using quotes and imagery from Tolkien’s books (and director Peter Jackson’s blockbust

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