EDMONTON, AB

Just days after Connor McDavid closed a deal with the Oilers, local youth pastor Collin Martens inked a two-year $25,000 extension with WestEast Edmonton Mennonite Church.

“We had to wait and see what McDavid would sign for,” said the church’s chief salary negotiator Allan Siemens. “He kind of set the bar, you know. Then we look at our youth pastor’s performance last season and settle on some appropriate level of renumeration.”

According to official stats, Pastor Martens scored 37 floor hockey goals, plus another 21 timely assists setting up the Settlers of Catan board during youth group games night.

“His defence against the Calvinists was a little weak, which is why he didn’t quite reach McDavid numbers,” said Siemens. “But I think he’s happy with his salary.”

Martens sa

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