DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am one of a group of friends who have known each other for 30+ years, from early middle age into what are now our “golden years.” We’ve been through a lot together, supported each other through individual struggles, and been there for the good times, too.

We are all now widowed, but still get together regularly to enjoy plays, operas, dinners out and to celebrate each others’ birthdays. These are occasions for us, not just “let’s meet for lunch,” and we dress for the occasions.

At these times, I make it a point to offer a sincere compliment to my friends -- anything from how well they are looking, to a becoming choice of clothes or an attractive hairstyle -- knowing the time and effort it takes to put ourselves together. But no one ever seems to reciprocate, and thi

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