Key points

Adoption begins with profound loss; every member of the constellation carries grief in different ways.

Core vulnerabilities like rejection, shame, and identity shape adoptees’ lives across their development.

Adoption thrives when birth, adoptive, and foster families collaborate with empathy and transparency.

Each year during November, we celebrate National Adoption Month. We honor the families built through adoption and acknowledge the thousands of children still waiting for permanency or reunification. Yet behind the celebrations and heartwarming narratives exists a far more complex emotional landscape, one that is often misunderstood, minimized, or completely overlooked.

For more than four decades, adoption researchers have emphasized that adoption is not a single moment

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