Gas-station weed was never supposed to exist. And yet, convenience stores across the country—even in states where marijuana is illegal—sell a trove of fizzy drinks, vape pens, and confections all promising to get you high. My neighborhood liquor store has an entire cooler full of weed drinks, including a seltzer aptly named Bong Water, a can of which has 25 milligrams of THC. About five milligrams of that chemical, which is the main psychoactive component in marijuana, will make the occasional weed user feel a light buzz. If that’s not enough for you, you might be able to buy a vape pen with 5,000 milligrams at your corner store.

These products are available because Congress messed up. In 2018, it passed a bill that was meant to support farmers by allowing them to grow hemp—essentially, w

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