The Dangers of Calling Family Estrangement a "Trend"

Key points

Estrangement is a response, not a trend.

Most estrangements follow long-term harm.

Media scrutiny targets the result, not the antecedent.

Distance is protection when all else fails.

Family estrangement has been framed in major media outlets as everything from a “growing trend” to a “social epidemic.” But this framing reveals a deep cultural bias : When the act of estrangement is scrutinized, but the conditions that make it necessary in the first place are ignored, people suffer.

Estrangement is not new, nor is it (usually) impulsive. Research consistently shows that estrangement often follows long-standing patterns of abuse, invalidation, psychological harm, or chronic boundary violations, not temporary conflict or impulsive whim.

In one study of 898 estranged parents a