YOU’RE glad Kelly Brook is back on telly, but you can’t help thinking that meeting her would be awkward given your sordid history of wanking over her in the 90s. Much like these celebs.

Liz Hurley

As a posh girl with big tits who’s done many wank-friendly lingerie/swimwear shoots, Liz is bound to have featured in your fantasies at some point. If you meet her, stick to smalltalk. She doesn’t want to hear about an acne-ridden teenage you furtively wanking over a picture of her in your parents’ Daily Telegraph. It’s hideous enough as a memory.

Kelly Brook

Whatever circumstances you meet Kelly in, it will be impossible not to think of all the self-abuse encouraged by 90s lads’ mags, an era now as lost in time as the achievements of Ozymandias. Luckily Kelly is a simple soul who’s always be

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