Platforms like Reddit have become informal hubs for casual-sex encounters. Users post specific requests, everything from hookup logistics to kink-driven invitations. In this story, that began with a “muff dive” request, slang for a woman seeking someone to go down on them. The dynamic that followed grew into elements of femdom—consensual female-led power exchange—and CFNM, or “clothed female, nude male,” a kink centered on exposure, contrast, and negotiated control. These terms may sound theatrical, but in practice, they’re often simple arrangements built on trust, clarity, and desire.

For this installment of the Secret Lives of Men , we spoke with Shaun*, a 30-something tech consultant from Philadelphia who stumbled into a late-night hookup request while grieving the end of his engage

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