Brought to you by Equipping The Persecuted:

Are you being persecuted for your faith? Oh no! That's not good! We Americans are experts in persecution, so we want to equip you with the tools you need to survive!

Here are some clever ways to avoid religious persecution:

Wear a Spider-Man costume when you go to the church so no one will recognize you: But then you might be persecuted by J. Jonah Jameson.

If someone asks if you're a Christian just shout, "BLACK LIVES MATTER!" and run away: If you try to share the gospel out of love for their souls they'll get you. Don't fall for it!

Get a rainbow "Ally" tattoo on your face: Everyone will then know you're not a bigot. Only bigots get persecuted.

Say, "Why don't you persecute someone your own size?": Works great on lions in the Colosseu

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