TOKYO, JAPAN

Abe from Winkler was shocked to discover he had somehow been elected Prime Minister of Japan.

“The support of the Japanese people is overwhelming,” said Abe from Winkler, with a tear in his eye. “Who knew that a humble corn farmer from the Pembina Valley could rise to the top of the Japanese political system without so much as even entering the election. It’s remarkable!”

So what plans does Abe from Winkler have for the future of Japan?

“I don’t want to change too much too soon,” said Abe from Winkler, “but I would like to move the Japanese economy in a more Mennonite direction. I’d like to see Nintendo move into manufacturing crokinole boards and Toyota branch into buggies. They might be a bit more expensive than your regular domestic buggies, but better quality and more

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