Getty Photo Illustration: Aly Lim Getty Photo Illustration: Aly Lim

My secret phobia? The hetero married couple at the party. The wife, though, is rarely the problem. At minimum, she's likely to greet me with polite eye contact and a warm, if modestly disinterested, smile. She might even compliment my earrings, even if she hates them. Meanwhile, the eyes of her husband will have glazed over. I might get a grunt before he wordlessly bumps into me, like a bird into a very clean window, on his way to the refreshments table on the other side of the room.

What's odd is I have no trouble making friends with single men. And though I'm appropriately wary of them, I sometimes think it's easier for me to connect with male strangers than with women. But once a man is married — and no l

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