WEST FARGO, ND - At Relational Church's weekly vision meeting Monday, Pastor Jeb Wilder attempted to suggest doing a sermon series called "Cash Jesus Ousside, Howbow Dah?" but was instantly incinerated by a miraculous lightning bolt, sources confirmed.

"Crazy idea - just hear me out," the pastor said excitedly as the misguided idea began to take shape in his head. "What if we do a sermon series called 'Cash Jesus Ousside, Howbow Dah?' It'd be a real hit with the young people."

But before the rest of the leadership team could shoot him down, God took care of it for them.

Though it was a clear, sunny day, the skies darkened in an instant, and several seconds later a powerful bolt of lightning came out of nowhere, rocketed down through the church's roof, and instantly burned the pastor to

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