DEAR MISS MANNERS: Are the rules for attending operatic concerts relaxed when the venue is a public place, such as a park? Today at the local opera’s annual concert, I gritted my teeth and said nothing to the sotto voce chatterers beside me. But when someone started loudly singing along, I turned and said, “Excuse me, but we want to hear him, not you.” Was this a “draw” in relative rudeness?

Your books and columns have given me much pleasure.

GENTLE READER: But not much tact, Miss Manners notices.

Your sentiment was valid, but the words a bit harsh, making it indeed a draw. Next time, perhaps you could politely tell your vocalist that you are having trouble hearing the singer you came to see.

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have just gone back to work with a broken wrist. How do I stop people, in

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