Key points

If you can resolve an issue on your own without lingering resentment, you may not need to discuss it.

Avoiding conflict can be healthy when used selectively, but not if it's your go-to default strategy.

When your relationship is generally strong, let the small things go instead of voicing every complaint.

Your friend made a joke that hurt your feelings. Your partner ignored you after you came home from a hard day at work. Your mom said something critical about your parenting . A colleague insisted on chairing a committee that you were next in line to lead. When these upsetting behaviors happen, you have a choice. Should you say something about it or let it go? How do we decide whether an issue is worth bringing up?

Social confrontation involves a discussion about a situat

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