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Hey you! Yeah you, pastor! Is your church boring? Is your congregation leaving in droves to go to the cool church down the street that has hot worship leaders and laser lights?

You gotta fix that. Here's how to make sure your bored congregants come back next Sunday.

1) Offer VIP backstage passes to meet the pastor: As the pastor, you are a celebrity and everyone wants to meet you. Offer exclusive VIP passes to the first 20 people!

2) Challenge the pastor of the church across the street to a cage fight: Bible teaching is fine, but what people really want is bloody pay-per-view MMA fighting! The winner of the match gets to keep half of the other church's members.

3) Offer anyone who shows up a chance to play bass in the worship band: Make dreams come true. Don't

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