PARTNER endlessly scrolling on her mobile? Ever wondered if she’s being entirely honest about what she’s looking at? Here’s the uncomfortable truth.

‘Just catching up on Insta, babe’

It’s Tinder. She’s not that into you and knows it won’t last, so she’s keeping her options open. Unlike you, who thinks you’ve found the love of your life and recently asked her to move in. That romantic marriage proposal you’re meticulously planning won’t end well either. It all feels so unfair, but at least she’s having to swipe through thousands of absolute twats.

‘Just catching up on the news’

By which she means stalking your presence on her friends’ social media profiles. She bloody well knows you fancy Sally, and if there’s a single heart emoji on any of her Facebook profile pictures she’ll find it a

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