HOBBITON - Denethor II, Ruling Steward of Gondor, has announced that food shortages will be impacting everyone across Middle Earth. Throughout The Shire, more Hobbits are having to go without second breakfast as a result of the reduced food supply.

"What are we going to do, Merry. We've just enough for our first breakfast," said Peregrin Took, more commonly known as Pippin. "Sure we've had one, yes. But what about Second Breakfast? What about elevensies? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper? How much longer can we last out here like this?"

"Us hobbits are sturdy folk, Pip. We'll just have to make do with what we have," said Merry. "But the way things are going, I'm worried we might actually lose a pound or two."

Many Hobbits have pointed out that the shortages are disproportionately

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