MANY aspects of modern dating are weird and distressing, even ‘happy’ relationships. Here are some nightmare partnerships the digital age has served up.

Therapy-speak Gen Zs

Can you even call them a couple? They prefer to be referred to as a stable situationship or an anxiously-attached ambivalent pairing, but rest assured you’re going to hear about it in f**king detail. You start to wonder if they’re aliens – do they know you can have sex using your genitals, or do they just spend all their time together analysing things?

Fitness freaks

Often spotted out on morning, evening, and possibly even smug nocturnal runs, this couple lives to punish themselves. With their main topics of conversation limited to reps, sets and targets, they probably only have sex to get their heart rate up. ‘Was

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