Finding the Holiday Gray

The holidays often bring a familiar tension: either dive head first into family obligations, overextending and managing everyone else’s emotions, or step back entirely to protect your peace. Some younger adults lean toward cutting ties completely, while others show up physically but feel anxious , resentful, or responsible for keeping everyone else comfortable. Both extremes make sense, but both come at an emotional cost.

What many of us miss is the gray: a middle ground between black or white, all or nothing thinking. The gray allows you to honor your needs, maintain connection in healthier ways, and participate without slipping completely into old roles that drain you. For those who study emotional patterns, burnout , and boundary setting, the holidays reliably trigger internal “p