LOS ANGELOS, CA — As the wildfires in California intensify, Democrat politicians across the state have shifted into lockdown mode to protect the state's strategic reserves of prefilled Kamala Harris ballots.

According to Governor Gavin Newsom, the fires could present an existential threat to election security in California if they get too close to the stacks of already filled-out Kamala Harris election ballots.

"Let's go, go, go!" Newsom shouted as teams of Democrat staffers sweated to move the precious bankers' boxes of Kamala Harris ballots out of fireproof security trucks and into strategic vaults. "We can't let any of these burn — the election's going to be close enough already and we can't risk any slip-ups here! Move that stack, Gayle! Hurry up!"

Unfortunately, Newsom has been so

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