Each week, exclusively for Slate Plus members , Prudie discusses a new letter with a fellow Slate colleague. Have a question for Prudie? Submit it here .

Dear Prudence,

I need advice about a situation that has really knocked me sideways. I’d been talking to a guy for about two months … before we met in person.

We’re both med students at different universities, both bi, and we clicked almost instantly. We talked constantly, shared a lot about ourselves, even planned future things we wanted to do together. He was never love-bombing or overwhelming. He was steady, considerate, and very open about having been hurt in past relationships.

When we finally met, it felt like all of that connection was real. But not long after, he told me he couldn’t commit to a relationship right no

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